the plan

i get in the minibus and i start driving. i wipe the congealed sweat and sunscreen from the windows and start driving. each day melts into the other, and i start driving. i stop at so many hotels and pick up so many people and struggle so against what seems to be an angry flow that when i’m on the road driving to these little preserves of silence and love, i am bound up like a twisted testicle cord and can’t even talk. hawaii is a mystery to me.

or in the morning i ride through the dawn with ring necks migrating in packs of two and four and seven. i round the mango corner and rumble past the ulu. kneed gears come to a halt among the stefanotis and the clouds are pink like an englishwoman’s skin.

or in the afternoon i come upon the garden with feet left among dried sporofitics ferns. the mud takes them home along with laupuaa and the breath.

or, and here is the last of it, as i regain the mountain mist enshrouds the great fruits and a flat plan surrounds me.

and waste, and waste, and waste.

but there is something better i remember as the Monster sweats through me.

there is something better.


Each day between the
Fake smiles and pressured
For a few moments
I find equanimity
And the leaf that rests
In margin-marked calm
Aches that much more.


In June, I attended a meeting at Cambridge City Hall about urban agriculture with some of the City Councillors. Boston has been publicly debating zoning and regulation for urban farming, commercial food production in the city, throughout the last year. Somerville, MA has already developed its own rules and regs:
Somerville MA ABCs (Agriculture Bees Chickens) of Urban Agriculture
Somerville Urban Ag Blog

Commercial rooftop, backyard, and basement farming is happening in cities all over the world.

Tokyo vertical gardens

Rooftop gardens in Beijing and Hong Kong

Hong Kong rooftop garden (in Chinese)

Vertical forest in Milan, Italy nears completion

Green Up rooftops

Harvest geek or internet of things for your garden

Urban beehive design

Asheville, NC urban farm school

FutureTech Farm: modular farm, “like Farmville with real plants”

Mapping available public lots in NYC and helping groups begin projects on them

Melbourne mobile air gardens

Tokyo business building grows food for employees on green walls

Vertical forest office building in Vietnam

Affordable apartments with rooftop farm in the Bronx

Urban farming units, greenhouses in containers

London’s Elephant and Castle Urban Forest

Allston/Brighton, MA apartment with gardens instead of parking lots

Prefab farm and retail food store

Red Hook, NY one acre farm

Strasbourg, France green walled building microclimate proposal

Eating the City and Town: Todmorden and Beyond
Local Food Network: Cambridge, MA
Integrated Urban Agricultural Systems
How to Heal the World
Urban Fruit Harvesting
Community Gardens as Permaculture Nurseries
Growing Green in the City
Celebrate Gleaning with the Boston Area Farm Gleaning Project
Urban Permaculture: Chicken Coop Grapevine and Water Footprint
Raspberry Gobble
How Cuba Survived Peak Oil

things i could and should do today, my day off

study for pre-trip inspection. exam in a week. i can do this by outlining the parts of the bus in detail and meeting with my father to go over the details.

go to a natural area to rejuvenate myself.

hang-out with an old friend.

pick up nick’s bike.

i don’t agree with this. “men” are not a monolithic entity with agency and choice and the ability to benefit from women’s objectification. men are caught in the same insatiability trap as women. female bodies are constructed as one of the objects men are taught to desire. and their abuse is indeed wrong. but (and not to diminish the hurt) it is just one of an ocean of insults individuals of every gender endure. i’d like to believe “men” (as a monolithic entity) really only want a quick fuck. but we do not. we want more than that. we want friendship and connection and intimacy and mutual aid and mothers of our children (or to become fathers to their children). we want to be real, whole, healthy people. repressive desublimation has, however, taken those honest and faultless desires and needs and twisted them into disgusting wants. we are drunkards stumbling through walmart looking for a tombstone at 3 am. as a quasi-reversal, i would say that it isn’t just that “men want what they want.” it’s actually a case of “consumers want what they want.” we see the world as constructs to be acquired, not entities to be encountered and enriched. women, too, “want what they want.” women, too, grope, manipulate, and (sexually) damage men. the difference is, when women do it it’s a reversal or a reclaiming of agency. women also “want what they want” in other realms, not so simply defined and confined as sexual objects. it’s fucking bullshit to tell someone to “lighten up” when their gender is under attack. it’s even more of a shame to examine the issue with such the restrictive myopia of a feminist lens.

Men want what they want.

So much of our culture caters to giving men what they want. A high school student invites model Kate Upton to attend his prom, and he’s congratulated for his audacity. A male fan at a Beyoncé concert reaches up to the stage to slap her ass because her ass is there, her ass is magnificent, and he wants to feel it. The science fiction fandom community is once again having a heated discussion, across the Internet, about the ongoing problem of sexual harassment at conventions — countless women are telling all manner of stories about how, without their consent, they are groped, ogled, lured into hotel rooms under false pretenses, physically lifted off the ground, and more.

But men want what they want. We should all lighten up.

It’s hard not to feel humorless as a woman and a feminist, to recognize misogyny in so many forms, some great and some small, and know you’re not imagining things. It’s hard to be told to lighten up because if you lighten up any more, you’re going to float the fuck away. The problem is not that one of these things is happening, it’s that they are all happening, concurrently and constantly.

These are just songs. They are just jokes. They are just movies. It’s just a hug. They’re just breasts. Smile, you’re beautiful. Can’t a man pay you a compliment? In truth, this is all a symptom of a much more virulent cultural sickness — one where women exist to satisfy the whims of men, one where a woman’s worth is consistently diminished or entirely ignored.

(Reblogged from lycheelyph)

CDL exam this week. go over pre-trip on saturday afternoon after waimomi

find MOOC; enroll

decide on mood-altering substances (contingent on the shimmering sea)

buy aquaponics components

find mala to observe

i think it was less me and more dentistry, student loans, isolation, and honolulu traffic.

i think it was less me and more dentistry, student loans, isolation, and honolulu traffic.